Posted by: Admin | September 5, 2010

WORDS OF WISDOM – Val Abernathy

I received one of those “Round Robin” emails the other day, the kind that you’re supposed to pass on to so many people like a cyber-chain mail letter. It caught my eye, so I set out to find out it’s origins and found a terrific website called Amazing Women Rock, which describes itself thus: “An online community for amazing women (and those who appreciate them). Our goals are to celebrate women by paying them tribute…” Another gorgeous, life-affirming website – knock yourself out and have a read (much more edifying than the Sunday papers).

I  would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I’ve aged I’ve become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I’ve become my own friend. I don’t chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn’t need, but looks so avant garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.Ihave seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon;  before they  understood the great freedom that comes with  aging. 

image © Jo Blackwell

Whose  business is it if I choose to read or play on the  computer until 4 AM and  sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to  those wonderful tunes of the 60  &70’s, and if I, at the same time,  wish  to weep over a
lost love  ….. I will.

I  will walk the beach in a swim suit that  is stretched over a bulging body, and  will dive into the waves  with  abandon if I choose to, despite the  pitying glances from the  jet set.  They, too, will get  old.

I  know I am sometimes forgetful.  But there again, some of life is just as  well forgotten. And I  eventually remember the important  things.

Sure,  over the years my heart has been broken.  How can  your heart not  break when you lose a loved one, or when a child  suffers, or even when  somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car?    But broken  hearts are what give us strength and understanding and  compassion.  A heart  never broken is pristine and sterile and  will  never know the joy of  being imperfect.

I  am so blessed to have lived long enough  to have my hair turning gray, and to  have my youthful laughs be forever  etched into deep grooves on my face.

So  many  have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn  silver.

As  you get older, it is easier to be positive.  You care  less about what other people think..  I don’t question myself  anymore.  I’ve even earned the right to be wrong.

So,  to  answer your question, I like being old.  It has set me free. I  like the person I have become.  I am not going to live forever,  but while  I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what  could  have been,  or worrying about what will be.  And I shall  eat dessert every single day  (if I feel like it).

Val Abernathy

posted on amazing women rock


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