Posted by: Admin | August 6, 2011

In Praise of Fathers

A Dad's love and approval - ensuring this little chap grows into a confident young man! Image © Jo Blackwell - please do not download or copy without permission. Thank you

I am 50 years old and I still miss my dad. I wrote about him last October on the anniversary of his passing.

The truth is, you never really lose a parent. Love them or loathe them, they live on in memory, in our hearts, and in the little voices we hear in our heads: you can do it…you’re useless…I’m disappointed in you…I’m so proud…

Yesterday we lost a relative who was a father and grandfather, pushing my husband and his cousins to the top of that particular family tree. We are now, effectively, the elders.

As I sent my condolences and informed the younger members of our branch of the family, that cold feeling I carried around after Dad left us tickled at my heart. To know you will never feel again the safety of a father’s arms around you, or smell that familiar, reassuring scent of him – these are things for which there are no words of comfort.

A good father is there to throw you in the air when you are small, to pick you up when you fall, to tell you that you are beautiful, or strong, or whatever it is you need to hear. A good father sets boundaries for us to make us feel safe, guides us and protects us and is prepared to fight for us to his last breath if necessary. I hope that my father, and the father who left this world yesterday, knew that they had done their job, and were proud. For we are all proud of them.

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Responses

  1. Growing up dad worked hard and mum was the ‘home maker’ as is was back in’th day, on a friday mum would have her hair done, and after’tea’ Mum & Dad would get dressed up to the nines, dad always goig to the drawer in the front room for a fresh handkierchief ! The gang of 4 would be off to The Romper, or maybe The Copperfield for a meal, Alan & Beryl, Barbara & Harry, the gang have gone but their sense of fun lives on in us all. ‘


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